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| OK here's the deal, my 22 year old sister has a boyfriend, she says she in love with him but hes a total jerk to her and her two kids, he doesnt live with them and he only is around on the weekends, he doesnt help pay the bills, and makes her buy all the food and cook gourmet meals for him and his three kids. (which live there too every weekend as a parenting plan so he doesnt have to pay child support to his ex)
he is always telling her how to dress, and how much money to spend and on what (her money btw) and if that's not bad enough, he spanked her three year old son with a belt for a method of potty training! i was SO mad that i wanted to call cps, but i knew they wouldn't do anything because there is no marks on him and they both would deny it. and he swated her one year old and threw her into her playpen because she was hungry and crying, that's all shes told me about the abuse, but there's other fishy things too, like her one year old mysteriously came up with a dislocated shoulder and no one knows how?
this guy is doing drugs and i believe shes doing them with him, (and i don't mean just pot) she always tells us about how upset he has made her, but dose nothing about it, she knows hes cheating on her and dose nothing about it, hes always putting her down and she dose nothing about it.
I'm at my wits end Ive tried not talking to her, I've tried to get involved and try to get her to see that hes a jerk but she still just loves him to death, shes always talking about how they are going to get married and live happily ever after, but i hate to tell her that he wont marry her because hes a cheater and a lier, (he still loves his ex wife and she knows that hes slept with her) and he also stated that he will not wear a wedding band because he thinks there cheap and meaningless. (i think its so that he doesnt have to remember to take it off)
any help would be appreciated, i don't know what to do anymore, i don't want to lose my sister and my niece and nephew to that kind of person, and when shes with him i don't exist neither dose any of the rest of our family, his family is more important to her than us, she calls his mom, mommy and calls our mom by her name, its getting really hurtful, when she complains (all the time) we try to give her good advice and she always acts like what we are saying is totally ridiculous and that there is nothing wrong, when we confront her she acts like she never said a thing! and that hes the perfect man. i have no idea what to do i need some help...shes lost it. |
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| I think you are a great sister!! But it seems like your sister is going to have learn the hard way. We always try to help the ones we love but until they learn by themselves, they will get mad at the person who intervenes. Do you have a father that can talk some since into her? |
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on 2009-02-10 16:10:49 by kathyp |
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| thank you for the advice and i think your right, i should just let her figure it out on her own and hope that she wakes up, not just for herself but for her kids sake too.
thanks again. lully |
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